Transitions

I've attended two commencements in the past eight days; the first was my son's and then yesterday my university had its commencement.

University life, of which academics are a part, is a different phase then what preceded it (with some overlap in classes and other activities in secondary schooling but usually with family oversight) and what follows it. Afterward preparation takes a back seat to activity, and socializing required much more effort.

When we make life transitions it important to note them and not pretend that they don't happen. It happens with relationships (some of which are long-term), it happens with changes of jobs, it happens with moving. We always hope that the transitions are for the better but there is never any certainty.

So we celebrate the transition. Hopefully the celebration eases the transition, brings to the fore all the uncertainties and says that they matter less than the love and support present in your life from your various communities, family members, friends, lovers, acquaintances.

That's not a bad thing. When people talk to me about transitions (and the discussion resonates with my own experiences) it is clear that people tend to get lost in themselves. Many details of transitions are specific to the individual, and it is not wrong to give them your attention. But there is continuity as well with your communities and it is good to stress that. Graduates dress in matching gowns. Everyone in the room is graduating together.

My country is undergoing a wrenching transition now that devalues those who do not match the cliched majority of straight white males (ignoring the fact that the demographics do not describe straight white males as being a majority).  It is important to note the transition. It is important to remember who we wish to be; many of us want to be a country that makes freedom a birthright that is irrevocable, communal and not just for those with privilege.

Far more important, it is a transition, wherever we end up, that we do not go through alone. None of my childhood heroes from the civil rights movement tried to do anything on their own. Every community that pushes back against ICE violence, every No Kings Rally, every single protest shows that we face this uncertain time together. It doesn't make the outcome any less fraught with peril but there are no safe transitions so (just as in Toy Story 3) we hold hands and step forward anyway.