Thoughts and Interesting Stories---Jeff Clark

Some things are fundamentally different now than during the first half of my life. Much of what I learned about the structure of our federal government seems no longer to be useful. One thing that I knew was that Congress had the power of the purse-strings. While the Executive Branch could spend the revenue, it was Congress who passed the budget, and the President signed it. Checks and balances, fights over priorities, compromises. It was one of the major tasks of the government, to fund itself and consequently fund the services it provides to the country and its citizens, and they took it seriously and acted promptly. I think we can thank Newt Gingrich for changing that. He is a point on a trajectory but I've learned to never underestimate the power of leaders to get large numbers of people to do evil things. He came to power as Speaker of the House by encouraging new legislators to speak of their opponents as traitors, distributing lists of phrases to use when speaking of the Dem...

I occasionally have drug flashbacks. I have never used illegal substances but I knew folk as an undergraduate who did, and sometimes I have memories of them come back unbidden. In particular I do remember a friend (we were both movie fanatics and frequently saw each other at showings on campus) who tried LSD and was not quite the same afterward. I had friends who encouraged me to try things. 99% of the time it was alcohol, and since I had an alcoholic uncle who used to beat my cousins I wasn't enthusiastic about going that route. Occasionally it was marijuana but since I used to be an asthmatic as a child I had no interest at all in inhaling any kind of smoke into my lungs. On rare occasions I would be encouraged to try psychedelics. I was small and uncoordinated growing up and I never prized my appearance or athletic ability but my mind seemed to work well enough to let me achieve things that made me proud. I never wanted to mess with that. The folk that encouraged me all claimed ...

The week has gone by swiftly. I don't believe there were many ad hoc things on my calendar, but it does feel a bit like a blur. This is part of my job and my lifestyle, at least during the academic year. I put a lot of thought and effort into my classes and so my time at work is pretty nonstop. I believe that I am better about being present with my family (mostly my wife now that we are empty-nesters) than I have been in past years, which means that overall I have less time for introspection, for contemplation. I have the summers to balance the rhythm out, and to a certain extent when I don't teach during our January term also a long mid-year break as well. There are more strenuous jobs and I have no complaints. I am someone who is an introvert and does value having time to hear my thoughts. I've made my bargains with the world around me that those moments of reflection are sporadic. Time stands still in them, almost perversely given the speed of the rest of my life. I miss...

I am of an age now where many of my peers have lost one or both parents. Some of them have lost them gradually, to the ravages of cancer, of Alzheimer's, etc.  I have been in that position with respect to one of my parents for a little while with respect to dementia, and the illness has progressed in recent weeks. My siblings who live closest are doing all the work; I try to provide support from a distance with weekly conference calls with them as well as frequent calls to my parent. There will be a big change shortly in the level of care in the facility seeing to my parent's needs as the dementia continues to progress. Phone calls are filled with long silences; letters and emails have long gone unread and I am a nine hour drive away, so I visit when I can. Having this piecemeal loss of a parent has made me reflect a good deal on what makes me me, and what would remain if I suffered memory or cognitive loss. It's probably common for folk in academia to identify their self, ...

I've spent a good amount of my adult life trying to grow out of biases I learned when young. Some are really obvious---being completely open to people of color, to all on the gender spectrum, to folk of all ages. Completely open to me means not limiting my expectations or willingness to interact with someone beforehand. I do have some biases that I want to keep. Maybe I need a different word for biases? Something that sounds more intentional? I don't have much respect for folk who put more than twice as much effort into complaining as they do into making things better. That lack of respect biases how I view them, whether I avoid interacting with them or choose to offer opportunities to other people. I've worked in groups long enough to know how much a whiner can degrade team performance, and I will live a more productive life by not being part of such teams. I will give a second hearing, a third hearing, additional chances over and over again to folk who are working hard. I...